46 mins: Mignolet gets away with a Cruyff turn but he'd be better off focusing on his goalkeeping.
45 mins: Steven Taylor gets a booking for irritating Mignolet as Cisse prepares to take a free kick on the edge of the box. Naturally, it does not hit the target.
43 mins: This game is being played at a snail's pace. Helpful for a man doing his first live-blog but not fans of entertainment.
40 mins: As if sensing they're being mocked by stats websites, Liverpool go close. Skrtel with a free header but it goes wide. He should have done better.
38 mins: Very helpful Squawka graphic showing the number of Liverpool shots today.
35 mins: An actual chance! Dreadful keeping from Mignolet and Cisse's shot is cleared off the line by Glen Johnson. Ah, shots on target, how we've missed you.
33 mins: It's very quiet inside the ground. Darke is plugging the Fletch and Sav show. They're using phrases like "chess match" and "tactical battle". Yep, it's pretty dull. Still, here's a lovely picture of Martin Skrtel warming up earlier.
30 mins: Half an hour gone and we've reached double figures for the amount of times Ian Darke has mentioned this game having more goals than any other Premier League fixture in history. He can say it as many times as he likes but it still doesn't mean we've had one today. Or, if we have, I've really struggled to keep up with the action.
26 mins: Poor old Gabriel Obertan. After an excellent start to the season, he's off with an injury and it doesn't look good. Rolando Aarons is his replacement.
23 mins: Received my first email! Now I know how Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan felt in that film. It's from Damian Durrant.
"Darren, why did Brendan link his destiny to the Circus del Mario? If he had said there were no strikers available everyone would have been fine with it. But to take on Mario was a cosmic roll of the dice, or ball. And it's coming up as expected. Largely goalless with the usual Mario media 'fireworks'.
17 mins: A minute's applause in honour of the two Newcastle fans who died in the Malaysian plane crash. Bill Shankly was wrong, football is not a matter of life and death and it's always worth remembering that.
16 mins: Another view of the penalty appeal and it still looks like Mariner got it right. Although his view of the incident was blocked by Cisse so it probably involved a bit of guesswork. Joe Allen can feel a tad fortunate though, seen them given. By mistaken referees.
12 mins: The perfect Christmas present for the Newcastle United fan in your life.
9 mins: Sissoko goes down easily after minimal contact in the box. For Robbie Savage, it's not a penalty. Nor, more crucially, for the referee.
6 mins: Other than a pretty half-hearted attempt at a tackle, Gerrard hasn't done much so far. If this is "doing his talking" on the pitch then it equates to a largely disappointing after dinner speech.
3 mins: Newcastle corner comes to nothing after a deflected Cisse shot.
12.45 After an impeccably observed minute's silence, Liverpool will kick off.
12.44 Apparently it's time for Gerrard to do his talking on the pitch. Or, better still, football playing.
12.42 It's an Ian Darke/Robbie Savage combo in the commentary box. The mute button has never looked more appealing.
12.33 Fancy watching a video about Balotelli's career in numbers? Of course you do. We're spoiling you at this point.
12.28 Andrew (née Andy) Cole reckons Cisse could have a huge impact today. Now's as good a time as any to remind ourselves of the single worst interview since records began. Glenn Hoddle always said it took him too many chances to score, clearly the same applies to answering questions.
12.21 The return of Papiss Cisse is good news for the home team. Remember when he did this? Loving the soundtrack, a nice diversion from the usual techno backing on goal videos.
12.15 Brendan Rodgers has confirmed that talks have begun with Gerrard over his new contract. This is great news for two key groups of people - Liverpool fans who think he's brilliant and opposition fans who think he's terrible. Once again, an opinion somewhere in the middle will not be tolerated. Middle ground is overrated.
12:07 The pundits on television are discussing whether or not Steven Gerrard will get a new contract. We'd rather look at this. We're not sure exactly what it is but we like it.
12.00 Balotelli starts which means we are in for a day of outlandish pronouncements from people on both sides of the Mario spectrum. Either he will prove to be the second coming of Kenny Dalglish, one of the absolute club greats or he’ll show us he’s more of a Paul Dalglish, a man who never made the grade. But did, as it happens, play for Newcastle. And score a couple of goals. What's it to be Mario? There is no room for nuance round these parts.
11.50 And, because I'm too good to you, here are the subs:
Newcastle: Elliot, Haidara, R.Taylor, Aarons, Cabella, Gouffran, Perez.
Liverpool: Jones, Toure, Manquillo, Lallana, Can, Lambert, Borini.
11.45 The teams are in and here they are:
Newcastle: Krul, Janmaat, S.Taylor, Coloccini, Dummett; Sissoko, Abeid, Colback; Obertan, Cisse, Ameobi.
Liverpool: Mignolet, Johnson, Moreno, Lovren, Skrtel, Gerrard, Allen, Henderson, Coutinho, Sterling, Balotelli.
11.40 Newcastle come into this game in fine form. They've taken seven points from the last nine and beat Manchester City away in the week, a COCUP cock-up for the champions. Liverpool have the history though, which has almost no bearing on what might happen today.
11.30 How times change. When underappreciated heartthrob Alan Pardew managed Newcastle for the first time back in December 2010, he was an unpopular appointment going into a game against Liverpool with many fans against him. Willow Smith was riding high in the charts and David Ngog, Paul Konchesky and Sotirios Kyrgiakog all featured. Context is everything. Pardew's side won 3-1 that day and the silver-haired fox would no doubt take that today.
11.20 Morning all, and, In the immortal words of Hank Kingsley, "Hey now." Like the very best footballers, I have the ideal combination of genuine desire and wanting the money so allow me to be your guide as Newcastle take on Liverpool in the clash that has produced more goals than any other fixture in the history of the Premier League. And there was no history before the Premier League, football began around the same time REM released Automatic for the People.
To get yourself in the mood for the inevitable 0-0 draw, why not watch one of the best games ever played in this country. 1996. 4-3. Martin Tyler losing his voice. This one has everything.
9.30 Good morning. Darren Richman will be here with all the pre-match build-up, team news and revelry from around 11.20am. Do ensure you are here for that. In the mean time have a read of the preview below and persue the links above.
Preview Liverpool midfielder Adam Lallana is confident there is plenty more to come from him and the team this term.
Following his summer move from Southampton, England international Lallana had to wait until September 13 to make his competitive debut for his new club due to a knee injury he sustained in pre-season.
He now has 11 appearances and one goal to his name for a Liverpool outfit struggling for consistency so far after the highs of 2013-14.
Second in the table last season, the Reds go into Saturday's away Barclays Premier League game against Newcastle lying seventh.
Lallana admits he is not yet firing on all cylinders individually but is optimistic his "best form is not too far away", and has also emphasised the entire squad's commitment to improving results.
The 26-year-old told liverpoolfc.com: "There's still more to come. I feel it's going to be a gradual process. There are lots of games coming, so hopefully my best form is not too far away.
"I knew it wasn't going to be easy joining Liverpool, but it's an opportunity I am delighted to have. I wouldn't change it for the world.
"I'll always give it my all and work my hardest, whether I'm playing well or not.
"That's an attitude that filters through the squad. It's an honest group here and I can assure you we're working hard in training day in, day out to put it right and get good results."
Sturridge was ruled out for two to four weeks earlier this month with a calf problem having only just recovered from a thigh injury sustained on England duty.
Reds boss Brendan Rodgers indicated to the Liverpool Echo that the 25-year-old would also miss the Merseysiders' Champions League game at Real Madrid on Tuesday and the home top-flight clash with his old club Chelsea a week on Saturday, plus England's encounters with Slovenia and Scotland on November 15 and 18.
Liverpool also still have Mamadou Sakho (thigh) and Jon Flanagan (knee) unavailable for selection, along with ex-Newcastle man Jose Enrique, another sidelined by a knee issue.
In Sturridge's absence, Rodgers will once again make a call on the best option in attack from Fabio Borini, Rickie Lambert and Mario Balotelli, who is the only one of the trio to have scored this season and broke an eight-match goal drought in the Swansea tie.
Meanwhile, Rodgers has praised the Newcastle hierarchy for keeping faith in manager Alan Pardew.
Pardew was under severe scrutiny earlier this season during a poor run of results for his side, but the 14th-placed Magpies have won their last three games in all competitions.
And Rodgers said: "It is great credit to the directors there at Newcastle, because I know Alan is a top-class manager, but we all know the pressures of being a manager if you're not winning games.
"We've seen already this season the number of boards and owners that change their manager."
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